First of all, I would like to say sorry. I’m sorry for everyone’s feelings I’ve hurt this year. Thank you to those of you who told me to my face, in public posts or in private messages that I was being a tw*t. I didn’t set out to hurt anybody; it was not intentional but it was inevitable for the journey I have been on.
Some people who have followed my work for many years have been disgusted by how things unfolded since the lockdowns started and I can’t say I blame them. It’s been messy. It’s been dirty and it’s been a display in duality on (I wouldn’t say epic but yeah…) ‘epic’ scale.
It’s been good vs evil and Christ vs Satan; Christianity was pitched against the occult and sometimes it was pitched that way for easy point-scoring. Not all my motives were pure or coming from love. After surrendering my life to Christ, I felt I had a bone to pick with my past. I can see the worst kind of hypocrisy in myself looking back and I’m not proud of it.
It’s not wrong to say that this journey started before I was born but I reached a fork in the road three days before the first lockdown in March 2020, when the number 666 appeared three times on my kitchen scales. I was weighing out my coffee beans (about 30 grams) and there was no logical explanation for the scales showing this number three times each time I placed the beans on the scale. It never happened before or since and it sent a chill down my spine.
Thanks to this life-changing event, I realised that we (not just me personally) were heading for difficult times. (I stand by that as an accurate assessment!) This realisation made me reach for my Bible but the rest isn’t history. I didn’t return fully to my Baptist Evangelical roots, nor did I end up joining a church (though I thought for a while I might). I continued to study and I continued to grow.
Probably, it would have been better for all of us if I had done so quietly but it didn’t quite happen that way. I’m learning as I go that my opinion on every single subject really doesn’t need to be aired…
The Reason for This Post
…which brings me to the reason for this post. I stated a while back that the Tarot is satanic and I would like to retract that rather hastily made statement. I’m not doing this because I think very many people care about what I have to say about the Tarot any more… but for the record: I was wrong.
3 Reasons the Tarot is NOT Satanic
- The Tarot isn’t even mentioned in the Bible. Yes, divination is but so are seership and casting of lots. Divination was forbidden in the Old Testament because it meant invoking Pagan deities and spirits/demons. It was seen as a form of rebellion because what one was trying to divine was not the will of God but rather how to get one’s own way. In the new Testament, divination is mentioned in connection with demonic possession (a spirit of divination, Acts 16:16). It’s possible to divine/cast lots without being possessed!
- The Tarot is the product of Christian culture, i.e. Catholic Italy in an era (Middle Ages/Renaissance) when everyone was a Christian. That’s not to say the iconography wasn’t affected by Pagan ideas/ideals but so is much of the art used in churches all around the world and so are many of the central symbols used to celebrate Christian Holy Days. The syncretic imagery itself isn’t evil; it’s just humans using symbols and images that speak to them in meaningful ways. Most of the time syncretism happens organically when cultures and religions merge. Christmas and Easter are both excellent examples of syncretism at its finest.
- It’s just a tool. If you enjoy working with symbols, it can be a very useful tool. Like anything that is truly useful, its origins are divine but like anything that has been created it can also be misappropriated, which is what happened in the hands of some of the occultists who offered the Tarot up to the Enemy and used it to empower themselves. If you think this is a stretch, please understand that these same occultists even use the Bible this way, ripping Scripture out of context to create magick spells, seeking to bend the Word to their own will.
The Tarot is Not Evil
As previously discussed, cards are in and of themselves not evil. They are just pieces of cardboard with pretty images on them. However, in my previous article, I don’t go in-depth about the Tarot. There is a stigma surrounding the Tarot and I, having added to that stigma earlier this year, need to put things right. So one more time for the people in the back: The Tarot is not evil or satanic!
The Crux of the Matter
The crux of the matter is if how we use the Tarot brings us closer or further away from God. That can also be said of things like science, gadgets, and music. At the moment, I’m only using the Tarot for contemplation, Gospel meditations (see Insta post below), and analysing situations more in-depth. To me, the Tarot acts as a map of the soul. Using the Tarot this way does bring me closer to God.
When I was constantly looking around to see how everyone else was using the Tarot, I did learn some things but I was also getting pulled off my centre and forgot about the things that really mattered, including my own spiritual path. I was never rooted (gasp!).
For me, the crux of the matter is quite literally my relationship with Jesus. I’m where I need to be with that now. Finally. It took some jostling and a couple of U-turns. I’ve come out the other side with a whole lot more peace, praise God!
It’s very easy to get lost, no matter what context/subculture you find yourself in, when you are constantly comparing yourself to others and looking around at what they are doing. FOMO keeps us distracted if we’re not careful. And I wasn’t careful – neither in the Tarot community nor in the Christian community. That’s on me.
But thankfully, we can learn to recognise the signs of being lost. For me it’s things like…
- incrased anxiety levels
- actually caring about the number of ‘likes’ posts are getting
- forgetting to pray and meditate
- spending way too much time on social media
- shopping instead of dropping (to my knees)
- compassion fatigue
- a need to justify
- us vs them mentality
It’s my heartfelt prayer that this post will help any of you facing similar struggles. I’m here for you if you need to talk!