3 Reasons Reading About YOU Beats Asking About Him


author of your own life story with the tarot

Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate. – C.G. Jung

During my first year as a professional Tarot reader back in 2011, I quickly noticed that the most popular types of readings were for questions along the line of ‘How does he feel about me?’ and ‘Will he get in touch/want to get back together?’ For a long time during my years of specialising in Love & Relationship Tarot readings over on my old site Love Dove Tarot, I was happy to oblige. 

Then the feeling of general ‘ick’ started to accumulate to the point where I finally had to ask myself that all-important question: ‘Are these types of reading actually at all helpful?’

The Tarot can be a wonderful tool for personal transformation and yes, also for divination but as I came to define divination (in contrast to fortune-telling) as an intuitive activity for the purpose of aligning yourself more fully with your Higher Self and Divine Purpose, I ran out of excuses to keep doing readings aimed at satisfying the fear-driven ego.

Not only is asking about a third party unhelpful, it can be harmful. How? It disempowers you from taking the action steps that align you with Higher Will and could also generate bad karma. For the bad karma I have generated for myself by doing this, I take full responsibility and would also like to take this opportunity to issue a public apology: I am sorry. I know better now… so hopefully I will do better too.


3 Reasons Reading About YOU Beats Reading About Him (or Her/Them)


Empowerment. The first and most obvious reason is that you shouldn’t engage in any activity that disempowers you. When your tooth starts hurting, you don’t go to a plumber for advice and when you do consult your dentist, you don’t ask about how to best up your sugar intake. Consulting the Tarot is like consulting a spiritual roadmap. If you ask it to spy on another person, you miss out on the expert advice the Tarot is intended for and you place your personal power in the hands of a) the person you ask about and b) your Tarot reader.

A Tarot reading centered on you and your journey should help you think more deeply for yourself, not stunt your intellectual growth or curiousity. That is why a really good Tarot reading almost always leads to more questions.

Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t.
― Steve Maraboli

It’s worth remembering that the only person you have control over is you… and also that when you do decide to take charge of your destiny, the choices other people make become a whole lot less important. They’re not on board? Fine. They simply weren’t meant to be. It doesn’t mean you step off your Path.

There is no better tool for revealing what you need to know about your Path and Purpose than the Tarot. When you trust in your own Path and Purpose, you no longer have a need to drag specific people along… and then you find that you only want to ask the right questions of the Tarot, which are always the questions that move you further along the path of your destiny.

Destiny is something you co-create with the Universe/God/Source. Fate is something a fortune-teller hands you an a silver platter; It may look tasty but you will find that it is crawling with worms…

Authenticity. The second reason is that every REAL encounter with the Tarot can help you peel away layers that keep you from living your life authentically. As the ‘Mirror of the Soul,’ the Tarot responds very well to questions about what is blocking you from stepping into the fullness of you power. Asking fearlessly, without seeking spiritual bypass, but staying open to frank guidance can make you lighter (i.e. more fully you) in every sense of the word.

Everyone carries a shadow, and the less it is embodied in the individual’s conscious life, the blacker and denser it is. If an inferiority is conscious, one always has a chance to correct it. But if it is repressed and isolated from consciousness, it never gets corrected.
― C.G. Jung

Creative living. Living creatively is about living proactively. Someone who has a proactive approach doesn’t look for clues about how life is shaping up around them all the time, or how people, events and circumstances around them are likely to shape their life. Tell me… Wouldn’t you rather be the author of your own life story?

Don’t be satisfied with stories, how things have gone with others. Unfold your own myth.
― Rumi

The Tarot can help you do just that; it can help you unfold your own myth.


Blessed Be!