Bringing the Inner Dreamer, Realist and Critic into Balance
This morning, I found a blog post by Chloe McCracken in my Facebook feed. The title is ‘What to do when life throws stones on your path.’ I’m feeling a bit stuck with regard to a community project I want to get going with so I thought I’d check out any tips Chloe may have for me. I don’t want to give anything away so I suggest you hop on over and read her post… but from it I got the idea to make a Tarot tool for my own inner dreamer, realist and critic, to help bring them into balance.
You see when I feel down or blocked in any way my Critic takes over entirely and tells me that there is no way for me to succeed and when I’m in a good mood my Pisces Moon is quite happy to just dream about the things that make me happy rather than act on any ideas I have. I strongly suspect that my Inner Realist still has some growing up to do and I’m hoping this little Tarot experiment will help.
My Inner Dreamer
The first thing I did was to randomly choose nine Inner Dreamer cards from the Frideborg Tarot face-down. I laid them out three by three. It turns out that the top and bottom rows were a perfect match for what I dream of achieving now, so I kept those… had a think about the middle row and discarded it because I didn’t like the challenge…
The birth of a new creative project
In the top row, I see the birth of a new creative project… something truly new… and something that will help me earn some money as well. Because bills. In the bottom row, I see a lucky break combined with careful planning leading to more teaching gigs.
Fortunately, my Inner Dreamer didn’t get the last say about which cards to keep and which ones to discard. Among those I discarded was the 2 of Cups which is the first card to show for what my Inner Realist has to say about this project. I do need to team up with someone… The problem is that I haven’t found them yet, so I need to go out there and actively recruit my future partner for this local project.
A Tarot Reading to Harmonise My Inner Dreamer, Realist and Critic
For my Inner Realist, I used more structure and chose to work with the Clarity Tarot spread:
My inner realist tells me exactly what Friday’s week ahead forecast told us all – future success is dependent on collaborations. The action advice in the form of the 2 of Pentacles, paired with The Chariot as the Quint/Spiritual Lesson tells me to act on this advice now and get the ball rolling. The 2 of Pentacles often shows up for me when I need to start moving and the act of moving is more important than seeing/knowing the end goal.
The Shadow Card is about the spiritual community legacy I wish to create.
My Inner Critic
As for my Inner Critic, I decided to pick 6 cards to cover all bases in Chloe’s article:
The first pairing addresses “That’s not possible because…” And shows me again that I cannot do this without a partner because I’m not practical enough, nor do I have a solid reputation in the community, such as that of the King of Pentacles. The second pairing speaks about “Worst case scenario, you end up with…” and is an obvious sign to me that the lack of trust that can be associated with 9 of Wands would lead to me going back to just dreaming about creating this community group. The final pairing covers “What’s missing?” “What are the weaknesses of the plan?”
OK, so here we have The Chariot making a comeback to emphasise that until I start moving forward nothing will happen. The weakness of the plan is that it does depend on my networking skills, which so far have been quite appalling within my local community. I have a tendency to go into ‘outcast mode’ which means I don’t bother trying to make friends after being knocked back a couple of times.
In my defence, a couple of very real incidents happened that took a while for me to get over but I am ready to let go of resentment and start opening up again. One of them involved being attacked in public about the very nature of my work and being accused of being a charlatan who preys on the vulnerable after I politely answered the question about what I do for a living.
Time to release the bitterness
Time to move on and release any lingering bits of resentment though I have long since forgiven the people involved. The bitterness lingers from several similar experiences in other places I have lived ever since early childhood and probably goes as far back as past lives since I have Chiron in Aries in the 11th House which prods existential issues wherever groups of people gather. I feel it’s also part of the bloodline healing I’m here to do.
Great post Lisa, I hope you are able to find who you are looking for in your local community to start the project. My astrology chart and dreams are telling me i need to also work with someone in the future for projects, I have chiron and the north node in 7th House Gemini, not easy for me and with the moon in sag, nine of wands issues. Good Luck to us.
Thanks Sophie, I call on the ministry of angels to help both of us so that we can be as effective as possible on our path of service! <3
Thank you Lisa, much love
I love how you used these prompts and the cards! When I created a tarot spread based on this model, I drew just a single card for each position. Yet, reading your post, it makes so much sense to take a different approach for each ‘personality’! Love it 😀
Almost entirely off topic, or perhaps not, it’s striking for me how you pull a whole heap of cards. I often draw out every ounce of juice from a single card, so I shy away from pulling quite a few. I’m trying to open myself up with that, especially reading TdM’s. Yesterday, I threw a Celtic Cross, where often I would have just drawn a single card 😀
Thanks Chloe – those three inner aspects of me totally demanded different approaches… We all had such fun! 😀
I mix and match too. Mostly I only pull three cards or use the Clarity Spread… I go with the flow of my inner guidance though. There are times when I’m made aware that just one card will do the trick.