If you are single and even remotely interested in spirituality, it is likely that you have been encouraged somewhere along the line to ‘call in your Soul Mate.’ There are a few problems with this however. The most obvious, beside most people not having a clue what a soul mate actually is, is that none of the available singles from your soul group may be ready for the forever love you happen to be ready for.
So what is a soul mate? It is someone you have spent at least one past life with and on the other side you are in the same ‘year’ (aka Soul Group) as the other person. The connection may or may not have been romantic in nature in your most recent past life. You may or may not have a contract with the other person to get together in this life-time, for the purpose of learning or clearing karmic debt. However, there is a myth that we need to bust right here and right now: You are not obliged to clear a karmic debt with a specific person. You both still has free will. Think about it; How are you supposed to clear karma with someone who chooses not to be in your life?
What you really should be manifesting if you want to meet your forever love is someone who is your vibrational match and who is capable of long-term commitment. If you are in the process of ascending into 5th dimensional living (as I know many of my readers are), your vibrational match will be found among any of those on the same spiritual path, regardless of soul group origin.
Here are the top three reasons why it is often better to find someone entirely new to play with:
- You start with a clean slate. There are no weird undercurrents or button-pushing that originated in a past life. Having to contend with psychological patterns created in this lifetime is often more than enough.
- You won’t feel bound to stay with the other person after the love has fizzled and the lessons have been learned. These kind of karmic bonds which can feel impossible to break free from are often found in Saturn Squares and Oppositions in your synastry chart.
- You have an infinitely larger number of potential suitors to choose from. Sure, it’s nice (some say priceless) to have a feeling of instant familiarity with someone… but come on! Ever heard the saying,‘ Life Begins Where Your Comfort Zone Ends’? Seeking the comfort of a soul mate connection is a bit like going through your phone list, looking for available ex’s as soon as a relationship ends. Wouldn’t meeting someone new be more fun?
I can hear a lot of ‘buts’ out there… Let’s deal with some of the most common ones.
But what if I am fated to clear karmic debt with someone?
Good news! As we collectively ascend into the 5th dimension, karmic bonds are becoming considerably looser. This is because the more conscious and aware we become of the true nature of reality and our own existence, the easier it becomes to resolve any lingering karma instantly. You can do this on your own, right here and now — No need to wait for your next long-term relationship so that you can both drag each other down into some karmic debt hell. That scenario is soooo 3D.
But this psychic told me that I would meet my soul mate next spring and we are going to be married with 2.4 children!
Guess what? You still have free will! What is more important than meeting your soul mate is that the person you have children by is a good person. Yes, you could meet your soul mate and fall in love before you find out that he is an alcoholic. Slow down and don’t live your life by the dictates of some psychic who may or may not be genuinely gifted.
But I truly feel that my soul mate and I are fated to stay together. He’s abusive but I must have been abusive to him in a past life.
This may or may not be a soul mate connection (It’s just as likely that you have matching psychological patterns). But you are never obliged to stay with someone who abuses you. If you are not strong enough to leave on your own, please seek help!
But nothing beats the feeling of instant recognition on a first date (or sometimes even as you connect through the ether) – It truly is priceless.
Then suit yourself. But don’t assume you know the other person just because you shared a past life together. You may have focused on spiritual growth in this lifetime, whereas the other person has made, shall we say ‘less edifying’ choices. Read the article Soul Mates, Schmoul Mates which illustrates this point perfectly.
Any more buts? I’m happy to answer any of your questions about this in the comments section below.
Amen! No more soulmates for me, thank you Universe! I had my share and enough is enough. Please Universe, send me someone NEW! Excellent post Lisa, thank you.
Glad this resonated, Eva! 🙂
I like it too, it feels like heaviness of failing to meet a soul mate is OK too as long I manage to grow. Viva! I am complete!
You ARE complete. Anything else is an illusion. Blessed be! 🙂
From my understanding of reincarnations, it is impossible to meet someone in this lifetime and have a significant relationship (being bound) with him/her without some strong, prior desire of the two souls to re-connect in a past life. Certainly, some connections are less charged, more vitalizing. They may also be briefer, unless if there’s an economical, pragmatic, or higher reason for which they need to stay together.
What great article, it really rings true to me right now! I called in a close soul mate at the start of the year and he arrived the next day…I came to regret it in a way due to the karmic attachments (though of course the lessons were necessary for immense growth). I recently met someone whilst overseas who I could truly be in the moment with and it really did feel like what you describe, just refreshing and easy. Though we are separated by great distance now, it was lovely just to have a very deep connection with someone without that almost obsessive draw that our soul mates can have, that can be so confusing and overwhelming.
Great timing for me to connect with this article just as I’ve realised that I’m done with soul mates for the time being. I just want to enjoy my life and allow myself to be completely blissed out in the moment. Allowing myself was all I needed to do : ) I won’t be calling in anymore soul mates, I’ll just be allowing myself with connect with beautiful men as they come into my life and more easily allowing these experiences to be what they are, releasing them with love when the time is right. Sure, soul connections will come and go as well, but love in the moment is my bliss and past lives or past experiences no longer weigh into it.
Love your work, Lisa. Have a great weekend!
Thanks for sharing, Ruth – sounds like a sound decision on your behalf. You have a great weekend too, sweetie!
“I’m done with soulmates”…cue contact out of the blue of past soul mate love. Oh universe, your sense of humour…:p
Gotta love the cosmic carrot that is this Universe 😉
Thank you for putting into words what I have been wondering in my head for over a year. I thought I was crazy but the Queen of Swords in me is so spot on after all.
You’re very welcome! 🙂 The Queen of Swords does come in handy 😉
QoS does help ground the Venus in Pisces in me. 🙂
Yup, she helps with my Piscean Moon too! 😀
What a person on his own can do to clear in this lifetime a karmic debt between him/her and a soul mate if a relationship is impossible, unacceptable or not advisable?
Forgive yourself and the other person. Depending on how you offended the other person, you may feel that it is right to do good works for others who have suffered harm in a similar way. But any good works should never be motivated by guilt, only by love. If they are motivated by guilt, it simply means you haven’t forgiven yourself. The truth is, we all do our best with what we know and when we know better, we do better. This is why ascending into 5D makes it possible to release karmic debts instantly. We pay karmic debts to learn. That is all. If you find a better way of learning, you gain reprieve time-wise.
Thank you! Be blessed ( if that is the correct phrase in English) for your honesty, caring for people, common sense and bravery – truth is not always pleasant to hear…
From a person with Saturn Rx in Pisces, in 7th house, resp. almost opposing Asc and in squares with Venus and Mars (which are in conjunction), 1-10-19 personal Tarot MA resp. no too much bad karma to clear
Have a nice evening!
Great post Lisa. I’ve felt the instant recognition and deep love of a past connection, but there’s also something so fresh and beautiful about knowing that you’re meeting someone for the very first time and that you’re building something new. I think it’s exciting to feel like you’re about to begin something that you’ve never experienced before. It’s like the difference between visiting your childhood home and sticking a pin in a map and getting on a flight to a place you’ve never been; both have their positives and negatives depending on where you are coming from.
Cool metaphor, Johanna! Agreed! 😀
Thanks for this. Angels have sent me a clear message.
You’re welcome, Stacey.