Let’s talk about Relationship Tarot Ethics! During my first year as a professional Tarot reader back in 2011, I noticed that the most popular types of readings were along the lines of ‘How does he feel about me?’ And during several years of specialising in Love & Relationship Tarot readings, I was happy to oblige. But deep down, I have always first and foremost viewed the Tarot as the mirror of the soul.
Would you hold up a mirror to someone else’s soul when they haven’t asked for it? How would you like it if someone did that to you? And how would you feel if they then someone else about what they saw?
Then the feeling of general ‘ick’ started to accumulate to the point where I finally had to ask myself that all-important question: ‘Are these types of reading actually ethical or even helpful?’
A tool for personal transformation
The Tarot can be a wonderful tool for personal transformation and yes, also for divination but as I came to define divination (in contrast to fortune-telling) as an intuitive activity for the purpose of aligning oneself more fully with Higher Will and Divine Purpose, I ran out of excuses to keep doing readings aimed at satisfying the fear-driven ego which is essentially what you are doing when you try to spy on someone else’s feelings. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you also springs to mind.
Mind your karma
Not only is asking to spy on a third party unhelpful in terms of your progress, but it can also be harmful to your soul. How? It disempowers you from taking the action steps that align you with Higher Will and could also generate bad karma.
This doesn’t mean that you can’t do readings about relationships but the focus needs to be on you and your own journey. No spying!
3 Powerful Reasons for Using Sound Relationship Tarot Ethics
The first and most obvious reason is that you shouldn’t engage in any unethical practice that disempowers you. Consulting the Tarot is like consulting a spiritual roadmap. If you ask a Tarot reader to spy on another person, you miss out on the deep wisdom of the Tarot. You also place your personal power in the hands of a) the person you ask about and b) your Tarot reader instead of owning your power.
A Tarot reading centred on you and your journey should help you think more deeply about the possibilities ahead of you. It should not stunt your intellectual growth or curiosity by making you even more attached to your ego desires. That is why an excellent Tarot reading almost always leads to more questions.
Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t.
― Steve Maraboli
You can only control YOU
It’s worth remembering that the only person you have control over is you. When you do decide to take charge of your destiny, the choices other people make become a whole lot less important. They’re not on board? Fine. They weren’t meant to be. It doesn’t mean you step off your Path.
And there really is no better tool for revealing what you need to know about your Path and Purpose than the Tarot. When you trust in your own Path and Purpose, you no longer have a need to drag specific people along. That is when you find that you only want to ask the right, most empowering questions of the Tarot. These are the kinds of questions that move you further along the path of your destiny.
The second reason is that every REAL encounter with the Tarot can help you peel away layers that keep you from living authentically. As the ‘Mirror of the Soul,’ the Tarot responds very well to questions about what is blocking you from becoming fully human as Mary Magdalene puts it. Asking fearlessly, without seeking spiritual bypass, can make you lighter (i.e. more fully you) in every sense of the word.
Everyone carries a shadow, and the less it is embodied in the individual’s conscious life, the blacker and denser it is. If an inferiority is conscious, one always has a chance to correct it. But if it is repressed and isolated from consciousness, it never gets corrected.
― C.G. Jung
3. Creative living
Living creatively is about living proactively. Someone who has a proactive approach to life doesn’t look for clues about how life is shaping up around them. They are inner-directed. And they take their cues from Spirit. Tell me… Wouldn’t you rather be the author of your own life story?
Creating a wonderful love life becomes possible when you are more concerned about whether or not the other person is a good fit for your life purpose than how they feel about you. This is also how all true Twin Flames approach relationships. This is how they avoid settling for someone who temporarily satisfies an ego desire.
I would like to finish with this beautiful quote by a great mystic:
Don’t be satisfied with stories, how things have gone with others. Unfold your own myth.
The Tarot can help you do just that; it can help you unfold your own myth and live a life of power and purpose. Ask those kinds of questions and liberate your soul!